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Uh oh, here comes the One Upper…

Posted by RL Policar On May - 3 - 2010

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At my place of employment, I will encounter an individual that knows I ride. So anytime he comes in he seems to have this need to one up me. If you’re not too familiar on what the term One Up means, check out this video.

Ok now that we have the definition in mind. Here’s today’s conversation, we’ll call him “Chaz” to hide his identity.

Chaz walks into my office, “What’s up bro! You been riding?”

RL: “I only rode once this week…”(I get interrupted)

Chaz: “Yah I just rode Bonelli Park with some of my other friends who ride. One of them is a cop who can get discounts on shipping!”

RL: (I’m thinking, what does that Cop have anything to do with riding)”That’s cool…”(I get interrupted again)

Chaz: “I’m unemployed right now, but I’m thinking of doing this 2 day ride in Hawaii. My wife and I have friends that live in Hawaii. You ever been to Hawaii?”

RL: “No.”

Chaz:”Well when you can afford to someday, make sure you go!”

RL: I nod…

Chaz: “So you been riding anywhere else other than the Fullerton Loop?”

RL: (I try to respond, but I get cut off)

Chaz: “Yah I’ve been RUNNING up Turnbull Canyon, yeah I figured the Loop is too easy, so I gotta up my game.”

RL: I nod…

Chaz: “You still riding THAT KHS?”

RL: before I could respond…

Chaz:”Yeah, I’m thinking of getting that new carbon IBIS, that thing is bad ass with its disc brakes. But for now I have a road bike that I use to train with 4 hours a time, a few days a week. Do you have a road bike?”

RL: “I do.”

Chaz:”I’m planning on doing that ride from San Francisco to LA on my road bike soon.”

RL: “Oh really?”

Chaz:”Yah you’d have to be in great shape to do that.”

This is a true story, it happened just right now, 12:05pm 05/03/2010. Chaz comes in to my office every few months and brings up the carbon Ibis, disc brakes, and his Hawaii ride every time I see him. I always get a laugh at guys like him that always see a need to one up and make themselves sound important.

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7 Responses to “Uh oh, here comes the One Upper…”

  1. Dan says:

    All I can say is “Wow!”…. and what douchebag!

  2. Brad says:

    somebody should teabag that d-bag!

  3. Dial Tone says:

    Oh so you know my cousin!

  4. Big Mike says:

    Haha! that guy sounds hilarious… When I was working as a customer service desk assistant (or something like that..?) in college, this one guy use to always come in and talk about crazy things like that too… This beautiful asian model from San Francisco he was dating online… That he needed to use our phone to call campus PD cause someone slashed his tire again (he ALWAYS had a flat tire)… etc, etc… One day, he asked if it was possible to get to San Francisco by bike cause he wanted to visit that girl he’s been talking to online. We said “Yeah, sure, I don’t see why not” and gave him a map of the CSUF campus and it’s immediate vicinity and an arrow pointing in the general direction of San Francisco…….

    ….. No lie.. we didn’t see him again for 4 and a half months… and when we did.. he rolled up on his bike, dirty as hell, with a flat tire.

  5. Big Mike says:

    wait.. does that make me a 1-uper??? HAHAHAHA.

  6. Wayland says:

    One of the best NBR post. Hilarious.

    But, didn’t you just one-up him, too?

  7. Adam says:

    We have “one-uppers” where I work as well. We named them all Stan. Every time you tell a story Stan has to top it. If you have done something Stan has done it bigger and better. Who is Stan? You can recognize his one-upness immediately. Start a story and he will interject with, “Shit, that ain’t nothing. . .” — STAN.

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