Father’s Day Dos

First off, Happy Dad’s Day to everyone out there. Everybody can celebrate in some form today. If you are a dad then I say congratulations. If not, then wish your dad a Happy Father’s Day. Even if you are a total bastard that man helped to make you who you are, hopefully for the better. If he was the stand-up kind of guy we hope to be then you should thank him. If he was a real arse then I say thank him too. Hopefully you saw him for the d!ck he was and you are determined to be better. If you are a d!ck too, well, you just make the rest of us look better so I say thanks.

Since I devoted so much time to my daughter in my last post I figured I’d give my some his due. He’s my boy, my pride and joy, my first born, the cause of my heartburn and frustration. That little punk sure has tenacity. Too bad most of the time it is misdirected. My wife and I knew we wanted kids but we wanted to wait a few years before we began knocking them out. My son had his own plans. Whilst on the pill he we determined to swim past the blockade of hormones and plant that seed. Our OB/GYN’s response, “It happens.” He was so determined to enter this world and start riding bikes he decided to come a month early. However, once at the hospital he took his sweet ol time coming out. My wife was traumatized for 25 hours. I guess he didn’t want to slide down the canal as much as he thought. He is 7 years old and still takes him time with everything. Hurry up buddy!

Thank you kids. You drive me crazy but you make me happy. Now get a job and contribute to this family.